“People are in our lives to teach us more about ourselves. Each person who crosses our path is another opportunity to learn more about ourselves. It is a doorway for more insight and transformation.” Oprah.
Personal, spiritual transformation comes by recognizing that others in our lives are a mirror of our selves. What we see is not always beauty and compassion. Yet to change we need to embrace both the dark and light of who we are. The good we find in others is in you too. The faults we find in others are our faults as well. The beauty we see is our beauty. Love and you will be loved. In the wisdom of St. Francis of Assisi seek to understand and you will be understood. Listen and your voice will be heard. This is a big lesson. It is the biggest lesson that we teach in Yoga Teacher Training. It is a lesson that I as the instructor have the blessing to teach and learn myself.
Every teacher training class is filled with enlightened souls who come with all their past baggage of relationships with authority figures, with teachers and all challenging relationships they have ever had (including myself!). Every time this lesson comes up (again and again over the time we have together) there is huge resistance. We loove to judge: to make someone else wrong and ourselves right, to make ourselves better and others lesser. Think of why Judge Judy is so popular! That energy creates separation from others and since the Divine is in each of us it creates separation from the Divine. Big ideas here yes! Stay with me a little while longer….read on.
This life is an ongoing journey. We have all been in situations when our buttons have been pushed. We can gain great grace when we shift our perspective and release our judgments of others. Rumi says “If you are irritated by every rub how will your mirror be polished?” It may feel appropriate to blame another that is a choice. When we “blame” it is a missed opportunity for spiritual growth and transformation. Harboring negative feelings literally destroys our health. We need to let them go. We can choose to step away from habitual judgments of others, blame and the reactive habitual response. Maybe you succeed once. Yay! Celebrate! Maybe you fall back to the usual a few times. It’s okay. The more often we get back on the band wagon to see our relationships (all of them!) as mirrors, releasing blame – the more we create new neuro-pathways and find the way back to peace, om, Shanti, shanti Om.
Over time the miracle of harmony in all relationships past and present will happen. Set the intention, take some moments of stillness per day and then let that go too! Trust and watch the miracle unfold!